Tag Archives: Friends

Friday Morning Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! As I think about my week I can’t help but think about my friend who get fired yesterday at one of the agencies I interviewed for. In fact the job my friend got fired from is one I want as it is a part time position. In all honesty, part time work will be a better fit for me than a full time position. The problem is that if this agency offers me the part time position, I’ll feel bad for taking it. I also know this friend would be okay with it.

Right now, I am dealing with a great deal of PTSD symptoms. Symptoms that aren’t helping me with fighting off some dissociation. One of the signs I’m about to dissociate is the feeling of me being a scared young child. This is when I start playing with the toys I have. I usually play with my Hot Wheels, Play Doh, Legos, coloring, and stuffed animals.

Something that I did this morning to help not dissociate is make myself breakfast. I made myself French Toast, scrambled eggs and some tea. As I ate, I read the news paper. The newspaper had the typical bad news but also had stuff about the Winter Olympics. The Olympics is a refreshing part of the news.

Thank you for reading about my ramblings. I hope everyone has a good day. Happy Friday!!! Peace Out, World!!!

Venting My Frustrations

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I am sitting here frustrated at friend, attempting to not get frustrated with him or the experience he is sharing with me via text. It does appear that he is getting frustrated with himself as well as me and my experience with a similar issue especially since it deals with Social Security and Medicaid. I understand where he is coming from and am frustrated for him. It just rubs me the wrong way when he (and others) demean my own experience. I’ve been dealing with Social Security since for twenty plus years and he only ten or so years. I’m feeling like since he is older than me he thinks I don’t know anything. I informed him of my frustration and he is more frustrated.

I’m thinking I need to put this conversation on hold with my friend so I can get some sleep or attempt to do so. I’m going to do some mindfulness and meditation to help me let go of some of this as it is not my issue to fix and I think my friend wants  me to “fix” it for him. This is where I know mindfulness will be helpful for me and my own recovery.

If it weren’t for me being in recovery I wouldn’t know about my own boundaries and that I need to use my DBT skills in this situation. One of which is Mindfulness. Another is to do get sleep and do good self care like blogging. Hell, mindfulness and meditation are good self care activities or at least for me they are.

It is almost one o’clock in the morning for me and I want to get some sleep. Have a good night everyone. I hope you all have some good sleep. Goodnight and don’t let the bed bugs bite. Peace Out, World!!!!

The Love Between Gertie & I

Posted on by jjuniorz

Hey! As Gertie mentioned last week, they want myself and Mama Bear to post every other Wednesday. I stepped up to the plate to post today and Mama Bear will do it next Wednesday.

I’ve decided to write about the love Gertie and I have. I originally met Gertie when she was found unconscious and unresponsive as well as barely breathing due to a suicide attempt. Gertie’s neighbor found them and called 911 when the engine company was called out to help Gertie. Fortunately, she survived that attempted suicide as well as a handful of others.

If it wasn’t for Gertie being survivor, I wouldn’t have become friends with them. Being friends with them is what helped me fall in with Gertie. Gertie has the endearing way about her that has people go to them as friends and for me it had me fall in love with them.

Thanks for reading. I hope this gives some insight of my love for Gertie. Have a great day.

Life, The Challenges & Silver Linings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Its been a tough week for my family. My grandma is going into hospice care and we are attempting the best we can to keep it together for her. My grandma is a strong woman. She keeps giving me “talks” to make sure I go to my job interviews next week.

I am looking forward the possibility of going back to work. I’ve been missing being able to go to work. I really think being able to go to work helps with my mental health or at least the structure that goes with it. Being out of work has you think how much structure one must have to be able to not get so depressed or at least that is how it is for me. Work also gives me the social aspect of life. So for me work helps a great deal with a multiple of things in my life.

Life brings the bad and the good. Sometimes at the same time like at the moment. As life continues I am looking at the silver lining in things. Its difficult at time however it is possible. Yes, I am being realistic about my grandma however I know she wants me to look at the silver lining.

Thank you the reading. Have a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Poetry; Day Three: Friends

Posted on by Gertie

Friends

by Gertie

Friends become family. A chosen family

Rare as it is, some even risk their own life for you.

It never ceases to amaze how close chosen family be.

Even thought there are an argument or two,

Nothing can get between our chosen family.

Dependability is something that is always counted on when times get bad.

So here’s to those friends who have become family.

 

 

Things I’m Learning From The Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook; Chapter 1

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It’s been a long day for me. I started of the day having breakfast at place called Biscuit Bitch with former colleagues who I have become close friends with. Food and friends is always a good thing even if its at 7:30 in the morning. I, then went to Day Treatment today and saw my temporary therapist Gilbert. Todays session with Gilbert was more difficult than it usually is. I might talk about the session in a later post.

If you been reading my blogging regularly as of lately, you will know that I started a workbook called The Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook by Anneliese Singh. I’m going to make every effort to tell you what I have learned after each chapter.

CHAPTER 1; GETTING REAL: DEFINING YOUR LGBTQ SELF IN A WOLD THAT DEMANDS COMFORMITY:

As the title of the chapter states, it has you define your LGBTQ self in the world around us. The chapter starts off asking how one identifies their sexual orientation and their gender identity. As it continues it starts asking about what you’re comfortable with sharing. This is the part where it started getting challenging for me as I think it depends on the situation I may be in.

Another part of chapter one that was difficult was searching within myself about affirmations I have toward myself and not just as an LGBTQ individual. This was difficult because I have very low self esteem and some if it is because of my gender identity and sexual orientation and some of it is not. Affirmations is something I need to work on and Gilbert agrees. He wants me to acknowledge that I have great affirmations and say them out loud.

Affirmations which I will say eventually. Maybe even after the end of this post. I should go and eat. Peace Out, World!!!

The Start of a Good Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Good News is that I got a relatively good nights sleep no matter how little I did sleep. I’m grateful that I got some good sleep.

Not only am I starting off the day with some good sleep, I’m going to be having breakfast with some former colleagues at Biscuit Bitch. Biscuit Bitch is near my old employer and people who work where I worked get a discount there. Biscuit Bitch serves biscuits and gravy. Their biscuits and gravy some of the best I’ve had especially since it reminds me when lived in Nashville for a year in my early twenties. Southern food such as biscuits and gravy seems to be yummy. Well all of it except grits.

As much as I am looking forward to breakfast with former colleagues, I’m hoping to hear back from potential employers. I’ve been applying to Peer Specialist jobs as well as similar jobs so I can hopefully go back to work. I don’t know if I’m 100% ready to go back to work especially full time but its worth a shot to at least get an interview or two.

I’m realizing what the time is and should start getting ready to go as I don’t want to be late meeting up wit former colleagues before they start work. I hope everyone has a great day at work. Peace Out, World!!!

Taco Tuesday + People Who Care = Fun Times

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Today has been a rainy Tuesday here in Seattle and has been a pretty low key day for me. Low key as in not really doing anything regarding attending appointments for my mental health conditions/challenges. In all honesty it’s nice to not have really focus on my mental health or at least when it comes to having to attend appointments, groups and so on.

As I mentioned earlier, its been a rainy day here in Seattle. Its actually not exactly “rain,” its the typical Seattle gloomy drizzle. Even though its the typical Seattle gloomy drizzle, Junior and I are kept low key.

We started off the day with some intimate moments. Intimate moments we haven’t had in quite some time do to my mental health symptoms being so severe. Yes, they are still pretty bad however they a improving. Improving enough that Junior you had not just one intimate moment today but several.

After a day of several intimate moments, Junior and I made dinner for a dinner party. We made the fixings for taco’s. We typically have dinner parties on the weekends however we saw it fitting to have a dinner party involving taco’s on Tuesday in honor of Taco Tuesday. As we had a taco bar with our friends we watched the movie; Wonder Woman. Wonder Woman never gets old. Everyone enjoyed themselves. Fun times were had by everyone.

Thank you for reading about a laid back and relaxing day. I hope everyone has a good rest of the work week. Peace Out, World.

 

Hello, It’s Me Again; Mama Bear

Posted on by mamabearraine

Hello! I am the motherly figure in Gertie’s life that they fondly refer me as “Mama Bear.” I haven’t posted in quite sometime and was asked by Gertie to do a brief reintroduction of myself.

I have known Gertie for over 17 years and have seen her grow as person as well as in their recovery. Yes, Gertie has been struggling the last year however I still see them making strides as a person and in their recovery.

As Gertie stated in their post yesterday, they want Junior and myself to post every other week and alternate the weeks we post with the excepting of this week. From my understanding Junior will be posting tomorrow. My post will mainly consist of what its like to be a motherly figure to someone who has lived experience. That shouldn’t be too difficult for me to convey as I am a mother of four children and my two youngest deal with their own mental health struggles. In fact Gertie is a role model and example of what recovery looks like to all four of my children especially my two youngest.

Thank you for reading.

A Two Paragraph Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I have decided once again to have Mama Bear and Junior start posting. They have only posted a total of twice each. I have informed them that I would like them to post every other Wednesday with the exception of this week. Mama Bear will post tomorrow while Junior post on Tuesday. On the Wednesdays Mama Bear doesn’t post Junior will and vise versa. As I stated earlier it will start next week.

Thank you for reading and I hope to post again in the next day or so. I appreciate all of you. Peace Out, World