Tag Archives: Reading

Sunday Morning Blues

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I know its been a couple of hours since I last posted but things changed quite quickly. Yes, I did finish reading the new paper and watching the morning news as well as doing my chores.

Unfortunately, as I was doing my household chores, I started becoming in crisis mode. That means I have urges to self harm. I did call the crisis team of the agency I seek services at and came up with a safety plan. A safety plan that I hope I am able to keep. I can promise you all that if I can not keep my safety plan that I will go to the hospital. I am NOT suicidal. I just feel like self harming. Again, if I am unable to stay safe I WILL take myself to the hospital. Part of my safety plan, I already mentioned in my last post at that is to read the fantasy book that I decided to start reading again since I never finished the book. I am looking forward to spending time in a good book and get my mind off of the shit of self harming. I hope that reading this fantasy book will do the trick

Another part of my safety plan is being around my cat, Lil Gertie. That means playing with her as well as cuddling with. That also means giving her some pets and loves. And of course cleaning out her litter box which I already did this morning. I clean it out twice a day. I have already fed her, her wet food and she has access to her dry food 24/7 so I know she won’t starve. So yes I have already taken care of her needs for the day except for her evening litter box cleaning. Now its time for me to cuddle up to her as well as play with her. That is if she is up to it as she is a cat.

Another thing I came up with the crisis clinician is to work on my art work. We decided that both coloring and painting would be quite helpful to me. I also informed the crisis clinician that I can combine painting and collaging as it mixes genres and is really cool looking. She thought that doing art is a great way to express myself especially with that of the mixture of genres.

The last part of my safety plan was and is to blog. In fact it was the first thing I decided to do as part of my safety plan so I could inform all of you my reader of my current struggles despite getting a good nights sleep and a good start to the day. Sometimes the struggles of a mental health challenge can come out of the blue despite how well it started. Blogging is quite helpful for me to hold myself accountable to others. Just as reminder, if the urges to self harm get stronger there is no need to worry about me as I will take myself to the hospital as well as call the crisis worker I talked to back. So, I do have an added safety plan to the safety plan I am informing you of. So, for me as I already mentioned helps me be accountable to others yet I don’t want others to worry about me.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. You my reader are all awesome in my eyes. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

(Side Note: Yes, I know I have mentioned it already, I am NOT suicidal. If I feel like I am unable to keep myself safe I will call the crisis worker back or take myself to the hospital or in worse case scenario, I will call 911. I just want make sure you all know that I have a back up plan.) 

A Foggy & Not So Sleepy Sunday Morning

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is a foggy Sunday morning here in Seattle. Looks like it could be another lazy day but I need to do some house work first. But first things first is that I read the Sunday news paper and now I am watching the Sunday morning news. I was able to get some sleep last night which is a major deal since I haven’t really slept for a few days.

Like I mentioned in my last paragraph I have household chores I need to do. Thankfully, there is not much to do. After watching the morning news since I have already read the news paper, I will do my chores to get them out of the way.

After doing my chores, I plan on reading most of the day. I plan on reading the fantasy book I recently picked up again. I started reading it again because I never finished the book the first time. The book is a really good book. I think I will be able to finish it this time around is because my consternation is a lot better due to the fact the symptoms of my mental health challenges are getting better. So, that what lazy thing I plan on doing most of the day besides playing with my cat, Lil Gertie.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a great Sunday. Peace Out, World!!!

Once Again, I’m Sleepless in Seattle

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is almost two thirty in the morning in my neck of the woods. I am unable to sleep. I am most likely unable to sleep tonight due to the fact I took multiple naps yesterday (Friday).

One of the things I have been doing since I have been awake is playing with my cat Lil Gertie. Since she appears to be awake most nights, I think she was appreciative that I was awake and able to play with her during her normal waking hours. I love the fact that my bond with Lil Gertie is growing stronger despite her not understanding I dislike getting up at the butt crack of dawn for no apparent reason.

Another thing I have been doing is catching up on the latest issues of my Wonder Woman as I have not been able to purchase the latest issues due to the lack of money. Now that I am working I have that luxury to do so. I have also been able to read the fantasy book that I recently picked up to read. So far the book is good but I am only on the fifth chapter.

I have also been doing some art work. Mostly, I have been coloring and some collaging. Both seem to be self soothing to me. I am almost done coloring a mandala. Maybe when I am done, I will take picture to sure you my reader.

I am going to go back to reading the fantasy book I have been reading. I hope everyone has a good rest of their night if it is still the middle of the night for you. If not have a good morning and/or day. I appreciate you all reading my blog. Thank you so much for reading, I appreciate each one of you.

Before I end this post I want to remind you despite being on social security for my disability and a new job, I am attempting to make a few extra few cents to dollars with the advertisements on my blog. If you click on the advertisements I can earn as little as a couple of cents to a couple of dollars. It would be greatly appreciated from my end if you the reading can click on the advertisements so I can have extra cash to pay for holiday gifts for family and friends during the holidays.

Again, thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I appreciate all of you from the bottom of my heart. I hope everyone has a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Lazy A$$ Friday

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday, World!!! I have a had a lazy ass Friday.  I have pretty much done nothing today. I have mostly taken naps as I didn’t sleep last night. Despite napping a good portion of the day I spent my waking moments playing with my cat, Lil Gertie, and doing hobbies I enjoy.

One of the hobbies, I did today was scrap booking. I did this to help me with dealing with the grief of my grandma because the scrapbook I am making has many pictures of my grandma. I am not sure if I am going to keep the scrapbook or give it to my grandpa but whatever I do with it, it is helping me to deal with the grief of the death of my grandma.

Another hobby I have done today was buy some Wonder Woman comic books. Actually, I was able to get a good portion of the Wonder Woman comic books I was not able to buy as of lately due financial reasons. So that means I am catching up on the latest Wonder Woman comic books.

One of the other hobbies I did today was paint. I was painting an abstract piece of art when my cat, Lil Gertie, stepped in my paint. So that’s when I came up with an idea of her walking on my canvas. Surprisingly enough she did it and now I have a very cool painting that I will frame and put on one of my walls.  The difficult part was getting the paint off of the feet of my cat, Lil Gertie. It took about an hour to wash Lil Gertie’s feet but I have an awesome painting of her foot prints. So her stepping into my paint was a blessing despite having to wash her paws for nearly an hour due to her not liking it.

So what I have done today has been quite helpful with my recovery. I love being able to do hobbies and it overall helped with making my day of isolation a great day. Yes, my depression has been acting up however my hobbies kept me from letting it get the better of me.

Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone enjoys the rest of their Friday. Most importantly, I hope every enjoys their weekend with whatever you are doing. I know some people work weekends and hope that those who work this weekend have a good work shift. Again thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Frustrating Night

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World. It is just after two in the morning in my corner of the world. My anxiety and PTSD are acting up big time because the building fire alarm went off once again. And once again I had to get Lil Gertie, my cat, into her carrier to evacuate the building. Only this time it was not a false alarm nor a malfunction. Someone’s apartment caught on fire due to the person falling asleep with a cigarette. Thankfully everyone got out safely and uninjured.

Now that I am back in my apartment, the first thing I did was calm down Lil Gertie as the alarm freaks her out. Now that she is calmed down I am reading a fantasy book. I am enjoying the book so far. I am only on the second chapter. I will tell you more about it in a later post.

Now, I think I am going go back to bed and attempt to sleep. I hope everyone has good night sleep. Good night and peace out world!!!

Still Sleepless In Seattle

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Yes, it is still morning in my neck of the world. It is now 7:15 in the morning in Seattle and I still haven’t been to sleep even though I have tried many times and many ways.

As I mentioned in my last post, I used meditation and mindfulness practices as well as meds. I did take an extra dose of both my anxiety meds and sleeping meds with permission from the doctor on call yet it didn’t help. I also attempted to watch television that is know for it’s comedy and humor which helps a good portion of the time but this time it didn’t help like I was wanting it to.

So, what I decided to do next was to spend time with my cat as she is quite helpful with helping me with my PTSD and anxiety and she helped a great deal. She is now sleeping next to me in my chair as I write this post.

Another thing I have been doing is hopes to help me sleep is reading. I have been reading comic books. Specifically, I have been reading Wonder Woman comic books as Wonder Woman gives me sense of strength to do what I need to do. Yes, I know I am getting strength from a fictional character but if it helps me with whatever I am going through which on this moment is attempting trying to get to sleep then I’ll use it.

So, as I say good morning (and goodnight again) I hope you all have a good day. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Have an awesome day. Peace out, world!!!

A Nothing Sort of Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Overall, today has been good. I have had bouts of crying spells due to depression and grief. Grief over the loss of my grandma, seven months ago today. The last seven months have has proven to be challenging due to the loss of my grandma as you never know when a sudden wave of grief will hit.

As I stated in my last post today was going to be a day of self care due to the grief of loosing my grandma seven months ago. I thought I was going to watch movies most of the day but it turned out to watching television or at least a television show on Hulu. I binged watched the show, E.R. I forgot how much I loved the show E.R.

I not only binge watched E.R., I read comic books. I specifically read Wonder Woman comic books. Reading gave my eyes a break from the computer screen and they were happy that I do.

I watched E.R and read comic books while curled up under my weighted blanket with my cat, Lil Gertie, next to me. My weighted blanket and Lil Gertie helped with my depression and anxiety today.

Today, was the perfect day to do nothing due to the weather. I am glad I decided to stay in and watch E.R and read Wonder Woman due to the weather. Despite being pretty isolated today I am glad I chose to be isolated. I had a good time binge watching E.R and reading Wonder Woman comics and plan to continue to do both after I finish with this post.

Thank you for reading my blog. I appreciate you my reader from the bottom of my heart. You guys are all awesome. I hope everyone has a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Lazy Friday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is Friday morning and I plan to take it easy today while staying in my pajama’s all day. Part of the reason I am doing this is because today marks the seventh month anniversary of my grandma’s death. Yes, that means I am still taking her death hard and obviously still dealing with grief. Another reason why I am taking it easy today is because of the weather. It is a rainy and dreary day here in Seattle. So the weather is fitting my depressive mood at the moment.

Since my grief and depression are acting up, I have decided that staying my pajama’s is a part of my self care plan which means I will staying in all day. Yes, I do have plans to do things here at home as part of my self care. As part of my self care I plan on doing today is watch movies. Not sure what movies I am going to watch but I plan on watching comedies as they are the most helpful to me when I am depressed and/or dealing with grief.

Another things I plan on doing today for good self care is reading. I plan on reading the Science Fiction novel I picked up from my home library. I also plan reading comic books. I will most likely be reading Wonder Woman comic books with a mixture of other comic books.

Having a good self care plan when I plan on staying home is key to making sure my depression doesn’t get worse. So, that is why I decided to do things that are quite helpful for me when I am home. The best part of me staying home now and being lazy is spending time with my cat.

I don’t have much more to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a good day and a wonderful weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Why Can’t My Brain Turn Off

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am struggling at the moment with my brain not turning off. I am not sure why I can’t turn it off at the moment. I have had a pretty good day as I spent it with my family.

I am wondering why my brain won’t turn off and there are many reasons why. Reasons I can’t take care of till tomorrow. One has to do with DSHS paper work that has to do with human and/or computer error. Another reason is that a couple of my medical bill have gone to collections and I thought I took care of it with the appropriate people so it looks like I will be on the phone a lot tomorrow and maybe most of the week. Oh how I hate being on the phone for things I thought I already have taken care of.

All this is making me worry about money even more than I should be worried about it. Hopefully all this will be taken care of this tomorrow if not sometime this week. There is nothing I can really do right now as it is Sunday and have to wait to a weekday to deal with all this shit.

Dealing with all this shit isn’t helping much with my depression which sucks. But one thing that is helping with my depression right now is my cat. Having a cat that is willing to cuddle with you when you are down is quite helpful. I love Lil Gertie, my cat, so much.

Spending time with my family overnight and this morning was quite helpful with trying to turn my brain off as well. It helped a little but not as much as I would have hoped. I did enjoy spending time with my grandpa.

Now I have to figure out how to spend the rest of my day as I need to keep busy. I guess, I can do the usual stuff with doing art work, read, and spend time with neighbors and friends. I might even look for more jobs and apply for them. Another thing I can do is go for a walk as well as do household chores.

I want to thank you for reading about what is going on in my brain right now. I just hope everything works out as it needs to work out. Have a good Sunday. Peace Out, World!!!

 

A Shower Does A Soul Some Good (Plus Other Things)

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! There is nothing like a good nice hot shower to help cleanse both the body and the soul. For me taking a shower is helpful for not just my soul but my depression.

After taking a shower, I decided to deep clean my cat’s kitty litter box. I tend to do this once a week as the normal cleaning of the litter box doesn’t always get rid of the germs; when you just scooping out the poop and pee.

I then did the dishes. After doing the dishes I mopped the kitchen and bathroom floors as well as some other household chores. Doing chores gives me a sense of accomplishment which helps with the soul or at least with my soul.

After I doing chores, I worked on a piece of art that I have been working on for about a week. Specifically, it is a painting that is almost finished. I just have to wait for the paint to dry to completely finish it as I need to do another layer of a different color paint.

As I wait for the paint to dry I read the fantasy novel I have been reading. I am really enjoying the book and am having trouble putting it down. On occasion I do put the novel down to read comic books. Specifically, Wonder Woman comic books.

So what I have been doing so far today has given me some hope as well as some peace. Hope and peace that my soul needed. My soul needed this because I needed to do some good self care.

I have realized that I need to do more self care for myself which includes doing everyday chores. Chores that mean taking out the trash and doing the dishes. Yes, I know doing simple chores may not be considered self care or something that helps one’s soul but for me it is self care and helpful for my soul. It also gives me hope and peace when I do fun things as well. Such as art work and reading.

Thank you for reading. It is much appreciated. Peace Out, World