Tag Archives: Weather

A Lazy Type of Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It has been a relaxing Monday. I haven’t really been productive today except with getting my meds and some wet cat food for my cat, Lil Gertie. Other than the two errands I did, I pretty much have been lazy today. It’s been a pretty lazy day because I really didn’t have much to do and the weather here in Seattle has pretty much sucked most of the day. It is nothing uncommon for Seattle’s weather to suck in early spring like today.

I have spent most of the day including now as I write this post is having some scented candles burning. This has been quite soothing to me today because the symptoms of my mental health symptoms have been high. For some reason it helps calm down the symptoms.

Another thing that I have spent most of the day doing is listening to music. There is something about music that soothes both the mind and the soul. Music is also something you can have on in the background doing other things.

As I was listening to music like I am now, I was also coloring. Coloring helps me be mindful of the current moment. Being mindful of the current moment is something that is greatly needed when things aren’t exactly going they way you want or need them to be. For me coloring helps with that.

While coloring my cat interrupted me on several occasions. It was obvious that she was doing her typical cat thing of wanting to “help.” So, when she wanted to “help,” I gave her the attention she was wanting and appeared content for another hour or two. I love my cat, Lil Gertie, so much.

Since I pretty much colored most of the day, I am going to read this evening once I am done writing this post. I love reading and it seems like an appropriate way to end to the a nice relaxing and lazy day. I really love reading. Reading helps me go to places, I would otherwise not be able to go. It also helps with my imagination which helps me forget my own problems and issues. Of course as I read, I will continue to have the music on and the scented candle burning and maybe my cat, Lil Gertie, will be willing to cuddle up with me as I read.

I don’t have much more to say. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a good rest of their Monday evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I realize it has been a week since I last blogged. I did attempt to post and have plenty of unfinished post to prove that I did attempt to do so. I honestly don’t have any excuses to why didn’t finish the post I started.

I guess I will make this post my weekly check in as I was planning to tell you what my week was like anyway. I guess, I will start with Monday. Monday, I went to my doctors appointment and had my annual wellness check done. It was not a fun experience like always because of my trauma history. Anyway, my doctor wants me to get an ultrasound done because my uterus is enlarged and no I am not pregnant. She did a pregnancy test to make sure I wasn’t even though I already knew due to not being sexually active for well over a year. So, I am waiting on my insurance to “approve” the ultrasound. I am also waiting for insurance to “approve” me for a mammogram even though I am now forty and “shouldn’t need approval” according to the paperwork I have from them but hey we all need to go through this stupid red tape from time to time.

Tuesday, I saw my psychiatric nurse practitioner for a med review and that went well. She increased my Ambien to ten milligrams. We briefly discussed how things were going and I was honest with her and informed her about my doctor’s appointment. She thanked me for updating her on my physical health issues.

I also saw my therapist on Tuesday and we ended up discussing a great deal about my annual wellness check up. We discussed this as it was quite triggering to me due to my severe and lengthy trauma history. We also discussed about needing an ultrasound and being “of age” for a mammogram and the emotions that go with all of it. He also brought up the fact that a program called “Path with Art” registration is open for spring classes as he knows I love to do art and be creative as well as trying to build structure to help with my recovery.

Thursday, I went and saw my denturist to get them realigned and adjusted. It went pretty well except my grandpa got upset with the denturist due to the fact the he asked the denturist why I was telling him (my grandpa) that I shouldn’t wear my dentures at night. The denturist explained at length why not. My grandpa was not all that happy with the answer because my grandpa has been wearing his dentures at night for years. My grandpa also brought up some concerns that he and I both had and the denturist put our minds at ease. I am grateful that my grandpa paid for my dentures.

I also saw my therapist for a second time in the same week on Thursday. We discussed shit that was going on in regards to PTSD and anxiety. We also once again discussed signing up for “Path with Art” which I did later in the evening.

In fact when I signed up for Path with Art, I found out I could only take one class which sucks but I understand as it is free and geared toward folks in certain programs/agencies. Part of the registration is to give them your top three choices. My first choice is how to tell a story through comics and I feel like this was (and is) the best first choice for me as I love comics. I hope I get into this particular class as I really want to learn more about comics.

Another thing that happened Thursday was my boss texted me to see if I could work today (Saturday) and I informed him I couldn’t. He said okay and wants to do a one on one supervision with me this coming Wednesday due to not taking shift the last couple of months which I understand why he wants to do it. I am a little fearful that I will be let go but I don’t think that is the case as my employer appears to be cool from my experience and my supervisor did say we were going to talk about availability for his on calls. Plus, if I am to be let go even though it doesn’t seem all that likely at the moment, I will accept the fact about being let go due to the fact of not taking any shifts so in essence, I will be taking responsibility for my own actions.  I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about the potential of being fired but it would be my own fault due to not taking any shifts when I was asked if I could do them. But like I said I don’t think that will be the case as I think they will just give me some kind of warning if it continues and like my supervisor said we will be discussing availability.  Also if it was something more official like being terminated, I am sure he would have sent me an email instead of a text.

I honestly don’t have much more to say except that the weather in Seattle currently sucks. It is windy and rainy outside. It is the type of day to stay inside and read type of day. Or maybe even a binge watch type of day. I most likely will be reading. I really love to read.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. If it wasn’t for you my reader, I don’t think I would continue to blog even though I do enjoy blogging. Again, thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Yucky Weather + Nothing to Do = Lazy Weekend, Reading

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! Well, it is another weekend and I have realized it has been four days since I last blog and I apologize for that. I don’t really have any reasons or excuses of not blogging except, I really didn’t feel like it for some reason.

Well, as many of you if not all of you know, it is the weekend. What many of you may not know is that the weather people here in Seattle keep saying we are suppose to have a couple of spring storms this weekend. Storms that are suppose to bring strong winds, pouring down rain and possible power outages due to strong winds. I can tell you right now from looking out my window that the wind is blowing due to the trees moving but it is not raining even though the clouds in the distance look ominous.

Due the so called spring storms coming, I’ll be a bit on the lazy side this weekend. Specifically, I will be doing quite a bit of reading. I will be reading Yesternight by Cat Winters. Hopefully, I will be able to finish it this weekend. I am really enjoying the a book immensely. I highly recommend the book. I will also be reading comic books; specifically, Wonder Woman.

I really do not have much else to say. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great weekend and is able to enjoy whatever you may doing. Peace Out, World!!!

Slept All Day On A Beautiful Seattle Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Today (Sunday), was beautiful day. It was a beautiful day outside that even Mount Rainier was out. Usually, on beautiful sunny days like today you can see Mount Rainier. It is a beautiful site to see. Sadly, during the summer it is quite difficult due from the fires from across this great state of Washington.

Unfortunately, I did sleep a good potion of the day. Not sure why I slept a good portion of the day as I actually got some good sleep last night. It wasn’t so so sleep but a good restful sleep. I think part of it is my depression. My depression either has me not sleep at all or I sleep too much. In fact it is usually not at all. I just wish I didn’t sleep on such a beautiful day suck as today.

On a plus note, I was awake during the times my friends and I have a potluck meal every Sunday. We do this every Sunday as we all remember having Sunday meals that extra family came over or when friends and neighbors came by. My friends (who are neighbors) decided to do this years ago to help keep that tradition going from our childhood despite some of our big age differences.

I just wish I did not sleep today away as it would have been a great Sunday to go enjoy the cherry blossom’s on University of Washington (UW) campus. Those cherry blossoms are beautiful to see when they are at full blossom. Seeing the cherry blossoms on the UW campus sure helps with my depression. I think that is what I am going to go do tomorrow (Monday) and bring my lunch with me. There is nothing like having a picnic on the UW campus when the cherry blossoms are in bloom. Hopefully, the weather will be beautiful like it was today (Sunday) and yesterday (Saturday).

I do not have much more to say as I am still pretty sleepy and could easily go back to bed and sleep even though I slept well last night and most of today. I would like to thank you for reading my blog as it is great appreciated from my end of things.  As the weekend comes to a close with only four hours and ten minutes left of it, I hope everyone had a great weekend. I also hope everyone has a great work week starting tomorrow (Monday) especially if you have a “typical” work week of Monday thru Friday. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Mental Health Challenges Suck Sh*t

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I just finished watching the evening news. There was really nothing good on the evening news but when does the news have good news. It seems like the news is nothing but Politics and depressing news. But then again politics can be depressing. Or at least the last two and half years, politics has been nothing but negative and depressing. More so than ever. I wish the news could share a minimum of two feel good stories each half an hour they are on. But that is just my own personal opinion.

On the plus side, the weather in Seattle hasn’t been as “bad” as the weather people said it would be. It was sunny with some clouds which is good thing because there was suppose to be a “storm” according to the weather people on the news. The weather people really don’t seem to know what they are talking about.

My Anxiety, Depression and PTSD are not relenting and wish the hell I could get a break. My mental health challenges appear to have increased symptoms which suck shit. I haven’t taken a show since Wednesday and that is never a good sign. I just wish I could take a bath because that would be a wee bit easier for me but unfortunately my apartment doesn’t have a bathtub in it. It does have a shower but a nice hot bath would be nice on occasion. I know I need to take a shower but I don’t feel like taking one. I know ultimately I will feel a ton better but I am just too depression to do so.

I think I am going to start reading my book Yesternight by Cat Winters. I think reading it will be quite helpful for me to get out of my own head. I really hope it is a good book like people having been telling me it is. It seems like an interesting book by what I read on the back cover.

I do not have much more to say. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Have a great rest of your Sunday evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Okay, Who Decided to Send Me Snow for My Birthday

Posted on by Gertie

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Good Evening, World!!! The above picture is what it looked like a good portion of the day. It snowed today, my 40th birthday. I have experienced snow before but never on my birthday. I have considered myself as a “spring baby” but every once in a while Mother Nature reminds me that I am technically a “winter baby.” When Mother Nature reminds me that I am a “winter baby” it usually is a wind storm with lots of rain and a few down trees and the occasional power outage but never snow.  In fact, I am still trying to figure out who sent me the snow for my birthday because, I sure in the hell didn’t want the white stuff for my birthday. I am not a big fan of snow.

Besides dealing with the snow for my birthday, I attended Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) group as it started today. In my opinion I think getting back into DBT Group and it starting today was the best birthday present I could give myself. I say it is the be present I could give myself because it is something that will help me throughout the years to come just like it has helped me the last fifteen plus years.

Another thing I am doing for my birthday is that a couple of neighbors are making a birthday dinner for me. In fact dinner is at 7:30 this evening and it is just after seven o’clock in the evening in my part of the world. I am looking forward to dinner with friends. I am happy that people are willing to celebrate my birthday with me.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope you all have a good rest of your Thursday. Peace Out, World!!!

Beating My Depression

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am pretty sure that many people have heard the news of Luke Perry passing away due to a massive stroke. This saddens me as I remember watching 90210 as a tween turning into a teenager. Yes, Luke Perry was attractive but he wasn’t the one I had a crush on in the show but I did act like I had a crush on him to fit in with my friends. It is sad that Luke Perry is dead at the age of 52. It is just another reminder on how short life really is.

Now on to other stuff that isn’t as depressing as Luke Perry passing away. Anyway, I did some adulting today. Adulting that is much needed this time of month. That is paying my bills. Nobody that I know enjoys paying bills. I know I don’t like paying them but it is part of being an adult. Another part of me adulting today was to pick up my weekly psych meds. I wish I didn’t need to take meds for my mental health challenges but they are a necessary evil for me as if I don’t take them, my symptoms are that much more unbearable and challenging to deal with.

Today’s weather in Seattle was absolutely beautiful. Chilly but beautiful. I ended up taking a three mile walk after doing my adulting for the day. It was yet another much needed walk. The walk in the sunny weather was quite helpful for me. Getting the much needed Vitamin D was an added plus during my walk as it is usually dreary and drizzly this time of year in Seattle.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated on my end of things. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s Been A Surprisingly Peaceful Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It has been a beautiful sunny yet chilly day here in Seattle. In fact it was such a beautiful day I went on a walk at the Arboretum here in Seattle. It was beautiful as always. I, unfortunately forgot my camera to take pictures with. I guess, I could have used my phone but the pictures wouldn’t be the same.  While at the Arboretum, I did some mindfulness and meditation practices. Much needed meditation and mindfulness exercises. I forgot how helpful they are and doing them while being in the fresh air and beauty was that much more rewarding.

When I got home after my time at the Arboretum, I decided to listen to music. I listened to the music so loudly that a neighbor asked me to turn it down. My music is normally not turned up so high it bothers my neighbors. The loud music was extremely therapeutic for me while it lasted. Yes, I did turn down my music and continued to enjoy the music I was listening to.

After spending a couple of hours listening to music, I decided to visit with some neighbors in my building who I have been good friends with. We chit chatted for about an hour and then play a couple of games for another hour or two. It was nice to get together with friends and just hang out.

All in all today has turned out to be a surprisingly peaceful day. A day that started out with me ruminating and worrying about something I really have no control over even though I know I am telling the truth. I think I am now going to fix some spaghetti and invite a friend over who happens to be a neighbor that lives in my building. Food and friendship is always a good thing. I want my day to continue to be peaceful.

I don’t have much more to say in this post. I hope you all have a wonderful Saturday evening. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s the Little Things That Will Help

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am not sure how to feel or what to think. As I mentioned in a previous post that I posted on February 26th, I had a meeting with the supervisor of the peer run help line I volunteer at. I was informed that someone that sound like me has been calling the peer run help line and well as the crisis line. I inform them that it wasn’t me and gave them a list of why it wasn’t me. The supervisor then said I could volunteer again on my regular shifts of Saturdays. I get an email yesterday (Friday) telling me to “hold off” as they “investigate.” I understand where this person is coming from as you don’t want a call taker answering phones on help line if they are not doing well themselves. If I were calling these help lines I would have admitted to the supervisor however I didn’t call them and feel like I am being punished. I also feel like I am not being believed and that feeling comes from the trauma I suffered as a child. The thing that frustrates me the most is this person said I could come back and then said to hold off as they investigate. I really like volunteering on the peer run help line and it has helped me a great deal to remain recovery focused and if I loose this gig because of something the folks at this organization think I am doing something I am not doing then I will be extremely hurt. Like I said I understand where the supervisor is coming from however I know without a shadow of doubt that I am NOT calling in. In all honesty, I wouldn’t be surprised if the supervisor reads my blog if they remember I blog. I mention as they are trying to figure out if I am stable enough to volunteer. Now, I am starting to sound a little paranoid but I really want to volunteer at this peer run help line as it has been quite helpful for me to remain focused on my own recovery. As you can tell this specific topic is causing me to have conflicting emotions and I need to use some of my skills.

On to another subject that isn’t so emotional for me, the weather. It is a beautiful sunny day here in Seattle. It may be sunny outside but it sure is colder than hell. I am not a big fan of the cold weather. Despite the chilly weather outside, I think part of my plan for today is to take two extra walks. I usually walk twice a day for a least a mile for each walk. However, I think today I will put in two extra walks, walking a least a mile. It is a beautiful yet chilly day here in Seattle and since the plans I had for this evening were pretty much cancelled, I have time for two extra walks.

I think another thing I will do is read comic books. I really need to catch up on the latest Wonder Woman comic books as I have fallen behind in reading them. If you have been reading my blog for a while you are well aware of that I am a huge Wonder Woman fan. I started reading and collecting Wonder Woman comics since I was in Kindergarten. Wonder Woman comics have been one of the constants in my life. One of the things I turn to on both the good and the bad days.

Something else that comes to mind that is a no brainer for me to do today is spend some quality time with my cat, Lil Gertie. I am one hundred percent sure that she has been picking up on the emotions I have been dealing with in regards to the volunteer job. Lil Gertie has been cuddling more than she usually does. She tends to do this when my emotions are starting to get the better of me and it helps a great deal. I love my cat so much.

Another thing I am planning on doing in place of volunteering tonight is watching The Umbrella Academy. I am really enjoying the show. I am hoping I can binge watch the rest of the show before the end of the weekend and if I can’t I hope to finish it before I see my therapist on Tuesday.

One last thing I plan on doing is reaching out to friends. Talking to friends has always been helpful to me. Plus it helps me not focus on my own problems. Friends have a way of helping you out even when they don’t realize they are helping you out.

As you can tell, it is a bunch of little things that will help me through all the various emotions I am feeling today. Sometimes it is all about the small things. Small things that can brighten someone’s day. And sometimes you have to create the small things to help brighten your own day.

I don’t have much more to say in this already long post. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you for reading. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. If you have beautiful weather go out and enjoy it. Peace Out, World!!!

A Complicated Valentines Day & Snow Finally Melting Away

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! The last week has been quite a week. In fact it was snowing here in the Seattle area for a good ten or so days and finally stopped yesterday. Granted it didn’t snow yesterday (Wednesday) but it was still at freezing if not below freezing outside so the snow stayed around. Now it is warm enough to melt the snow. It is currently raining in the city of Seattle. Sadly snow is could be in the forecast again this weekend which is something nobody really wants at the moment.

As many of you know, today is Valentines Day. A holiday I never liked even when I had a significant other as why do we need a special day to say “I love you.” This year is a complicated Valentines Day. Not as complicated as last year but still complicated. Today makes the one year anniversary of my grandma passing away. Today has been a difficult day for me and the rest of my family.

Sadly, I was not able to see my therapist this past Tuesday due to the agency I am a client at was closed due to the snow and was hoping to see him before today so we could come up with a plan to handle the grief I am dealing with today. He did call me yesterday and we discussed ways on how I can remember my grandma today. We even made another appointment for me to see him tomorrow (Friday) so, I can check in with him to see how things went today. In fact he did call me today as well to check in on me as he wanted to make sure I was still doing okay. I am still doing okay but I really miss my grandma. I am grateful for my therapist checking up on me and rescheduling our appointment.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I hope to be posting more but right now I am fighting off isolation and grief. I hope to post sometime this weekend. I want to thank you for reading my blog as it is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!