Weekly Check-In

Good Evening, World!!! It is that time in the week that I do my weekly check-in. I know it has been a few weeks since I have done a weekly check-in and I hope you can forgive me for not doing one. I do not have an excuse for not doing one and I am not using the holidays as an excuse.

As all of you know this past week we had New Years Day. I watched the drone and firework show that was held at the Space Needle. I stayed home and watched on television so I didn’t have to be out in the cold with a bunch of strangers. I was at home in my pajamas with my cat, Billie bringing in the New Year watching an awesome firework and drone show that was at the Space Needle. I enjoyed it and I am grateful that I was at home with my cat, Billie.

New Years is also a time when people reflect on their lives and how they can change in a positive way. I do this throughout the year and New Years is just a good reminder to do that reflections are a good thing to improve myself.

One of the ways I am wanting to improve myself is to continue to go to therapy. In fact I went on Thursday for an appointment with my therapist. We discussed how I can deal with some uncomfortable emotions like anxiety and anger. We discussed how writing down my feelings can be helpful which reminded me to show her the journal I bought myself for Christmas. She liked the fact that I already had the idea of writing down my emotions as well as thinking that my journal is pretty. She also thinks that writing down my feelings especially my anger is a form of harm reduction. She thinks this due to the fact that I tend to stuff my anger and then emotionally explode by screaming and yelling when I’ve had the last straw when something makes me angry. So my therapist thinks writing when I am angry is a good thing and she suggested that afterwards to reach out to a trusted natural support person. I really like the idea of reaching out to a friend after writing about my anger.

I do not have anything else to discuss or write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader continuing to read my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Holiday Traditions

Good Evening, World!!! I would like to inform you of my own personal holiday traditions as it was suggested to me to start my own early on in my mental health recovery. The reason why it was suggested to me is because of some of the unrealistic holiday traditions that were placed on me by my family. No disrespect to my family as I love them very much but creating my own holiday traditions have helped me cope with my family as well helped me cope with my PTSD and depression.

When it was suggested to me by my therapist at the time early on in my mental health recovery the only thing I could think of regarding traditions for myself was comic books. Specifically two comic books that focused on Christmas. In fact the comic books I am speaking of are Christmas with the Superhero’s volume one and two by DC comics.

Over the years I have added to my holiday traditions. I have included the typical traditions of watching movies and listening to music. I have also included with the help of friends of the Jewish faith of spending a night or two or three celebrating Hanukkah with my friends who celebrate it. I am grateful that I can help celebrate Hanukkah with my friends who celebrate it. Besides watching holiday movies, listening to holiday music and spending two or three nights celebrating Hanukkah, I have included the following traditions to my list: reading holiday focused books, doing holiday or wintery focused jigsaw puzzles, doing holiday focused logic puzzles, doing Christmas dot to dot, and doing artwork focused on holidays or wintery scenes which includes coloring and diamond art/painting.

Now that I informed you of what I do for my own holiday traditions, it is challenging to know how my family traditions will change this year and next year due to my mom passing away two days before Thanksgiving. I say this year and next year as this year it is so fresh. I know I will keep some of the Christmas traditions my mom instilled upon me. As far as my dad’s side of the family they will still celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve as one of my uncle’s birthday is on Christmas and celebrate his birthday on Christmas.

I do not have anything else to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out and Happy Holidays, World!!!

Weekly Check-In

Hello World!!! I don’t know how much I am up for blogging my weekly check-in today. I am just so overwhelmed with the election results. I am also overwhelmed by how other people’s behavior is affecting me due to the election. I am also angry and frustrated with myself for reacting the way I did when someone misgendered me again and it is the same person that keeps misgendering me. Sadly, I feel like this particular person gets away with shit but that is how I feel and I know I should not react the way I did.

On that note I went to therapy this past Wednesday and of course we discussed the election results as my last session with my therapist was the Wednesday before the election. I see my therapist every other week. We discussed the fact how I fear for my safety as a disabled non-binary person with a uterus that is a part of the LGBTQ+ community and queer communities due to the fact that America voted in someone who is full of hate. We discussed ways to cope and take a pause as I am having a tough time pausing at the moment.

One of the ways I will be coping is doing art work especially the way Seattle weather is currently with it being stormy and yucky outside which is normalish for this time of year. I have been doing diamond art/painting as it is something I can do inside with the yucky weather. I have also been cuddling with my cat, Billie. I love being able to cuddle with my cat especially when the weather gets yucky here in Seattle. I love my cat so very much.

I do not have much more to write about in my Weekly Check-In. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Breakfast with a good friend
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Clean apartment
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Cuddle w/my cat Billie throughout the day

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Breakfast with my partner, Junior (after he gets off work)
  • Call grandpa to thank him for his military service
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Take and return calls for Alley Cat Project
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Cuddle w/my cat, Billie throughout the day

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Take and return calls for Alley Cat Project
  • Read
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Cuddle w/my cat, Billie throughout the day

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • In person appointment with my therapist
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Dinner w/my partner, Junior and our friends
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Cuddle w/my cat, Billie throughout the day

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • In person appointment with employment specialist
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Take and return calls for Alley Cat Project
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Read
  • Cuddle w/my cat, Billie throughout the day

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Take and return calls for Alley Cat Project
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Read
  • Dinner w/a good friend
  • Cuddle w/my cat, Billie throughout the day

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • U-District Farmers Market w/my partner, Junior and one of my good friends and her partner
  • Lunch w/my partner, Junior and one of my good friends w/her partner at Red Robin
  • Art (color and/or diamond painting)
  • Read
  • Cuddle w/my cat, Billie throughout the day

Daily Prompt; Describe One Positive Change You Have Made In Your Life?

Daily writing prompt
Describe one positive change you have made in your life.

A positive change I made in my life was when I went I decided to go into a two outpatient Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) program. I went into this program because I needed some help learning new skills to help with my emotional and verbal outburst as well as my self harming behavior and multiple suicide attempts. At first I was extremely wary of it however I am beyond grateful that I went through this DBT program and graduated from it. This was the second major adult decision I made for myself and my recovery. The first major adult decision I made was when I went to Mercy Ministries (now Mercy Multiplied) like I described in yesterday’s Daily Prompt post. Going into the DBT program was one of the most important decisions I made in my life and I am grateful for it as it helped me make bettered decisions in my life.

Depressed In Seattle

Good Afternoon, World!!! Right now I am struggling with increased depression symptoms. I do not like having depression but I do not know anyone who has depression that likes having it. I have been isolating most of the day with the exception of my morning walk and going to the grocery store this morning. Isolating is not always a good thing for me as it keeps me in my own head.

Being in my own head for any reason is not a good thing especially when I am isolating. Since, I have been isolating I have been doing some art work. Specifically, I have been coloring a giant poster I bought from Stuff2Color.com. The giant poster I am coloring is a Mandela. I like Mandela’s as they help me be mindful just like coloring does.

The other thing I have been doing besides art work by coloring is cuddling with my cat, Billie. I love spending time with my cat, Billie. Billie is a very sweet cat and I can’t imagine my life without him. I also took some pictures of Billie as well as selfies of me with him. Billie is an awesome lovable lap cat.

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I do want to thank the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Read
  • Art (color and/or rock painting)
  • Work on mental health recovery workbooks

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Work on mental health recovery workbooks
  • Dinner with friends

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Attend Queer Space (in person) group
  • Kickball practice
  • Work on mental health recovery workbooks

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Emerald House virtual group
  • Attend (in person) WHAM group
  • Work on mental health recovery workbooks
  • Kickball practice

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Sexual Health: An Essential Part of Recovery Training (virtual)
  • LGBTQ+ virtual group
  • Kickball practice
  • Work on mental health recovery workbooks

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Virtual appointment with therapist
  • Dinner with friends
  • Work on mental health recovery workbooks

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Kickball game
  • Work on mental health recovery books
  • Read
  • Art (color and/or rock painting)

The Bright Side of Focusing on Recovery

Good Morning, World!!! It is the start of another work week and sadly I am unemployed due to disability reasons. A disability with major stigma attached to it which is mental health challenges. As much as I am not a fan of my disability and the stigma that goes along with it; I am glad that I need it for my chosen career path as a peer specialist.

As much as I wish I was working as a peer specialist or working at all, I am happy to be focusing on my recovery. My recovery is key to not only my chosen career field but to my everyday life. Life that includes a life worth living. A life worth living with a cat, friends, loving partner and a wonderful physical health team as well as an awesome mental health team. I guess what I am saying is that the bright side of focusing on my recovery at the moment is that I can completely reevaluate what a life worth living looks like for me at the moment.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Tough Couple of Nights

Good Morning, World!!! It is just barely after five o’clock in the morning here in Seattle. It’s been a tough couple nights due to suddenly remembering something horrific from my childhood a couple of nights ago. On the good note about this is when I remembered, Junior was with me and then the next day which was yesterday, I had therapy.

Therapy is not meant to be easy but yesterday was tough but my therapist was compassionate and empathetic as always. She listened and gave me some suggestions to help take care of myself. My therapist makes talking about tough shit safe to talk about even when it feels unsafe due to PTSD symptoms.

Due to those PTSD symptoms, I had a couple of challenging nights and lack of sleep. Junior helped me Wednesday but was unable to help last night (Thursday) due to working. Sadly, he is unavailable today and tonight due to work as well. He is a firefighter and works twenty-four hour shifts and is doing an overtime shift today. Anyway, last night I had the help of a couple of friends via phone as well as my cat, Billie. I am grateful for my natural support system.

I do not have anything else to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Read
  • Attend a virtual 12-Step meeting
  • Art (color or rock painting)

Monday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Read
  • Art (color or rock painting)

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Read
  • Art (color or rock painting)

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Work on recovery related workbooks
  • Read
  • Art (color or rock painting)
  • Attend a virtual 12-Step meeting

Thursday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Training via Zoom on Recovery and Eating Disorders
  • LGBTQ+ virtual group
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Read
  • Art (color or rock painting)

Friday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Attend an in person appointment with psychiatric nurse practitioner
  • Read
  • Art (color or rock painting)

Saturday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App.
  • Daily morning walk
  • Go to U-District Farmers Market
  • Read
  • Art (color or rock)
  • Attend a virtual 12-Step meeting.