Trainings, Work, Volunteering & Other Related Stuff

Good morning everyone!! Yes, It is still morning in my neck of the woods. I am looking forward to this afternoon. I am going to a training about youth specific suicide prevention. The best part of this training is that it is being offered by the Crisis Clinic and I am able to attend for free because I am a Warm Line volunteer. (Side Note: The Warm Line is under the umbrella of the Crisis Clinic.) Being able to attend training for free at the Crisis Clinic is one of the many awesome benefits I have for being a Warm Line Volunteer. I love being able to attend the various trainings because it helps me learn new skills that I not only need for my volunteer jobs but my career. It also looks good on the résumé.

Speaking of careers and résumés, I am going to be working on my résumé tomorrow. I have to update it with a couple of things including my volunteer job at the young adult shelter and the training I am going to today. I am updating my résumé  because once my one year anniversary is up at work, I am going to apply to peer specialist positions. Like I have said in previous post, I applied and accepted my current position as a Consumer Aide to get my foot in the door. Yes, I will be applying within the agency I work for but there is only one position posted at this point in time and it is not a guarantee that it wont be already filled when my year is up. I am hoping it will still be up so I can apply for it. I will also be applying at other mental health agencies. No need to be picky on where I apply at this particular time in my career because I am just starting out in the whole grand scheme of things.

I am looking at the time and realize I need to cut this post short. I need to cut it short because of the training I am attending this afternoon. I have to take the bus and am planning on eating lunch near by the training before it starts. I hope to blog about the training later on today. Have a wonderful day everyone. Peace out!!!

Decided To Sleep-In A Lil Bit

Good morning everyone!!! It is another Tuesday. That means it is time for a daily prompt but it is going to have to wait till when I get off work. I decided to sleep in an extra half an hour. I normally get up at 5:00am but decided to get up at 5:30am. 5:30am is the latest I can get up with out the potential of being late to work. With me sleeping in an extra half an hour, I didn’t have time to choose a daily prompt so that is why I am going to do it when I get home.

I am actually looking forward to getting off work today. It is not because I don’t like my job because I love it. It is because, I’m actually in the mood to clean. Yes that means I’m going to clean or at least clean a little bit. Even though my place is not that messy, I feel like it needs to be cleaned or at least tidied up.

Well, I best be going. I do not want to miss my bus. If I miss my bus then I will end up late to work. Nobody wants that especially me. I will blog again when I get off. Have a good day everyone. Peace out!!!

The Day My Career Changed

Today marks one year since I found out I got my current job as a consumer aide. I was ecstatic that I got my current job. It took all my might to not stick it on Facebook till I had put in my two weeks notice at my previous employer. I thought I owed it to my previous employer to not announce it to the world before they found out I was leaving. They did help me with the job experience I needed as well as giving me some life long friends.  I realized that no matter where I work I’m still going to be part of my previous employers “family” and am beyond grateful for that.

As I look back over the last year, I have realized a great deal about myself not just personally but professionally as well. I learned on how tight nit the mental health community is and how much we really need to rely on each other. The mental health community is also quite small. That is why we need to take care of each other. There is always something to learn in my current career. I think the learning new things is one of the many reasons why I enjoy my career in the mental health field. I have always enjoyed learning and am looking forward to the learning opportunities I will be able to access. Learning opportunities I might not have been able to receive due to the lack of funds. Most importantly, I am able to be an example of what recovery looks like.

As I look forward to what my future looks like in my career, I hope that this time next year I will be a peer specialist. It is the most logical step in my career path. It is what I have been wanting the last two or so years. Now that I have experience, I think it would be a good idea to apply to be a peer specialist. If I get a peer job outside of the agency I currently work at, I will be a little sad. My current agency gave me the break I needed, career wise. I started with them as a volunteer and now I am employed with them and hope that I will be able to get a peer position within the agency. Even if I get employed elsewhere as a peer my current employer will have a soft spot in my heart. The did give me my start in the field.

Now that I told you how today was the day my career changed, I’m going to call it an evening and relax. I hope that everyone has a wonderful and relaxed weekend. Peace out everyone!!!

Thinking About My Career

It is hard to believe that this time last year, I was waiting to hear back from my current employer if I got my current job. I am more than thrilled that I got it. It is giving me the paid experience some other mental health agencies desire in a peer specialist candidate. I not only love my job as a consumer aide, I also love the agency I work for.

Loving my job and the employer I work for is why I am finding it difficult to do be looking for a job as a peer specialist. Yes, I am looking for peer specialist jobs in the agency I work for but that doesn’t always mean I will get the job. Once, I hit my one year anniversary in my current position, I plan on applying for peer specialist jobs. The reason why I am waiting for my one year anniversary is because it looks better on the résumé when I apply for jobs outside the agency I currently work at.

One thing I find amazing when comes to the entire job search process, including the interview process is on how much experience future employers desire. I’m bringing up this particular issue is because how are you suppose to get experience when nobody will hire you due to the lack of experience. I chuckle at this because I had one mental health agency turn me down for a peer specialist position early last year because I didn’t have enough “paid experience” while other agencies told me the reason I got an interview was because, I have “great deal of experience, whether it is paid or volunteer.”  I don’t think it should matter about the type of experience you have if you have the experience. I realize that some career paths don’t necessarily have ways to volunteer in which leads me to, how in the hell does one gain experience.

I am just grateful that my volunteer experience is one of the many reasons I got my current job as a consumer aide. It goes to show you that what you have in your résumé does count. I just hope that my current position at work as well as my current and former volunteer jobs help me get a peer a support position especially one that would be fit my personality as well the personalities of the future clients that I would be helping.

Another thing that I worry about in regards to looking for a job as a peer specialist are the clients I currently help in the consumer aide position I am in at the moment. I worry about how it will affect them when I leave to a peer specialist position especially since its only been just under a year when I started. I just don’t want it to do more harm than good especially since we have had an extremely high turnover in staff the last three to four months for the particular program I work in. It has been quite difficult for the clients. I know realistically on how resilient my clients are, it’s just a concern of mine that having another staff member leave so soon after so many other staff left around the same time. I know I will have to leave and move on eventually and there is never a good time to leave when it comes to dealing with people who struggle with a mental illness. It is something to think about as I update my résumé and cover letters.

I do know as I update my résumé and cover letters that I will have to do a salary history letter as well. I am not sure if I am comfortable doing a salary history if I’m not 100% sure I am going to at least get an interview. I don’t even know how to do a salary history letter despite my efforts in looking for examples online. I will be asking my therapist the next time I see as well as asking one of the peer specialist that I talk to on occasion when I go to my appointments at the mental health agency I seek my services at. I do know that before I apply anywhere I have to first update everything as well as ask people to be references. Asking for references will not be the difficult part. The difficult part will be the salary letter and I am okay with that.

I think I have bored you all enough with my career and how I am wanting to move up in the world. I best be going because I have an overnight shift at the young adult shelter I volunteer at. In fact it is my first overnight shift. I usually do evenings but think it would be a good experience for me. I hope to do one overnight shift a month and three evening shifts a month. Any way before I get more off topic I will end this entry for now. I hope to blog again tomorrow and tell you how my first overnight shift went. Have a good night all. Peace Out!!

11 Months

Today, marks eleven months since I started my wonderful job as a Consumer Aide at a local mental health agency. I love my job. I know it is not exactly the position I desire to be in but its a foot in the door. When, I applied and interviewed for my current job, I knew that I would start looking for jobs as a Peer Specialist (or Peer Counselor) once I hit my one year anniversary. Not because that’s how long the job last because it doesn’t but because the longer you are at a job (or employer) the better it looks to hiring managers. Yes, that means in a month from now, I will be looking for Peer positions. I will be looking within the agency I am employed with as well as outside the agency.

To be honest with you, I am a little apprehensive to start looking for a peer position. I am apprehensive because I fear I will not be what people expect, desire or worse a let them down. Another reason why I am apprehensive is that I have become fond of my clients. Even though it is highly discouraged to have “favorite clients,” it naturally happens. I am also a little nervous that I will get lots of interviews but no job offers. That is what happened when I was looking for peer jobs that last time, which led me to my current position. As you can tell, I am lacking in self-confidence and that is something I am working. on.

I hope that when I do start applying for Peer Specialist positions that it doesn’t take long for me to get a job a peer. It took sending six résumés and cover letters, five interviews and one job offer over a matter of five months before I got my current job. I’m not going to let that get in the way because, I know what hiring managers a looking for now and I have “paid” experience in the field. Not only that, I have been volunteering at the Warm Line for eleven months now and at the young adult shelter for two and half months. I’m sure that all my work and volunteer experience will help me at least get an interview.

I am just thrilled that I am working in the mental health field even if its not my desired position. I love and enjoy what I do. I am grateful that I am able to be an example of recovery looks like to the clients I serve. I am a little sad that as soon as I get a position I desire I will have to say goodbye to my clients.

I best be going now. I need to get ready for the day. I am looking forward to volunteering at the Warm Line this evening. Have an awesome weekend and have some good ole fashioned fun. Peace Out!!!

Common Sense Training

If you regularly read my blog you know I am Consumer Advocate at a local mental health agency. What you may not be aware of is that the agency I work for requires all full time direct service staff go to monthly trainings. Me being part-time I technically don’t have to go however my new supervisor wants be to attend especially if it is a day I normally work. In all honesty, I am quite happy to attend the trainings even if it is a normal day off for me.

The problem I have is that the trainings that I have attended is that most of the trainings are common sense trainings, especially if you have a degree of some sort in the mental health field and/or have worked in the field for a while. For instance, todays training was on Trauma Informed Care. Don’t get me wrong, I am pleased I went to the training, its that I don’t understand why my employer puts on a training that seems like common sense and I don’t even have a college education. Yes, I have been through trauma and have been a client or consumer of the mental health system for most of my life and maybe its because of my experience that it seems like common sense. My co-workers who I directly work with even thinks its a common sense thing if you have the education and/or working in the field for a while. Maybe, I am just being too hard on my employer.

I am grateful for my job and the trainings I am able to attend through my employer as well as trainings I am able to attend through my volunteer jobs. Any training I am able to attend despite on common sense it may be, I am beyond thrilled to attend because it broadens my “education” and am able to stick it on my résumé.

Now that I have bored you with my complaining about the training I attended, I am going to end this particular for now. Have a good evening all. Peace Out!!!

Back To Reality

I am going to try to keep this particular post a short one. It is now back to reality. The reality of having to get back to the swing of things, now that my vacation is over with. I am fairly close to being done with unpacking. Yes, I do have some laundry to do but it can wait a couple of days.

I am looking forward to going back to work. I do have to say that going back to work at my current employment is a much different feeling than going back to work after a vacation at my previous employer. My previous employer I would be dreading going back to work. My current employer, I’m not dreading going back after a much needed vacation. Loving your job helps a great deal in the transition of going back to work after a vacation.

Junior and I are grateful to be home and be able to sleep in our own beds. We spent most of last night having some intense and pleasurable intimate moments. I am beyond blessed that I have a man who treats me right and does not hurt me. Junior and I our grateful for our intense love we have for each other.

Before I end this post for now, I have to say that I am a little jealous of Junior right now. He doesn’t have to be back to work to Wednesday. He deserves the extra few days off. He doesn’t have the easiest of jobs. He is a firefighter. Well, I should get going and make dinner. Have a wonderful week everyone. Peace Out!!!

Daily Prompt: State of Your Year

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “State of Your Year.” How is this year shaping up so far? Write a post about your biggest challenges and achievements thus far.

It’s the third day of July and that means the year is half over. The year now being officially half over is why I decided to do this particular past daily prompt.

The year didn’t start off on the happiest of notes. If you are a regular reader and/or follower you are aware that I had miscarried a set of twins in January. It was a devastating start to the new year. I was looking forward to being a mama. Needless to say the miscarriage has had me wanting this year to end two weeks into it.

As January turned into February, I realized that I not only wanted the year to be over, I wanted to end my life. I wanted to end my life due to miscarrying. That is when I realized I needed to get help by putting myself into the hospital twice. The first time for two weeks and then a week after I was discharged had to go back in for another five days. I was disappointed in myself that I needed to be hospitalized for psych reasons because it had been nearly three and half years since my last discharge from my last psych hospitalization. The miscarriage hit me harder than a bag of bricks hitting the bottom of the Grand Canyon.

Despite being hit by a bag of bricks, I realized that this particular crisis was different from the rest; I didn’t harm myself in any way. Yes, that means I didn’t attempt suicide nor self-harm. If one thing could come from the sadness of loosing a set of twins and the crisis that came after it, is that I don’t need to self harm nor do I need to go through it alone.

The major thing I have learned this year is that I am not alone and most importantly I know who is truly in my corner. Don’t get me wrong, I have known who has been in my corner for quite some time, I just fully realized on who is in my corner. I also realized that, those of who I thought were in my corner when it came to me being in a crisis weren’t able to do so, like I once thought. Now I know that it doesn’t matter how long you have known someone or how you met that person, it matters that they step up to the plate when a crisis arises.  Sometimes it’s a person you don’t necessarily expect.  An example of someone like that is my friend Susan over at https://bravelybipolar.wordpress.com/.

As the year continues on and the help of many people like Susan, my fiancé, Junior and many others, it is slowly but surely better. Yes, I still have my difficult moments but realize that the initial crisis of the miscarriage is over. It has taken quite some time for it to be over however I have accomplished the fact that I not only not harmed myself in the crisis, I was able to allow others in my life to help me in one of the most darkest hours of my life.

Looking back on my year thus far, I would say that one of my major accomplishments is continuing to live my life as I would have before miscarrying. That means, I continued on going to work, going to my volunteer job at the Warm Line and most importantly spending time with friends and select family members. I also allow myself to grieve over the loss of my children. Amongst the major accomplishment of living my everyday life in the middle of a crisis, I decided to volunteer other places.

Yes, I’m now volunteering not only at the Warm Line and the Mental Health Clubhouse I am a member of but a young adult shelter. I’m doing this because, I not only miss volunteer at the main shelter of the mental health I agency I am now employed at but I want to eventually work with young adults struggling with a mental illness. The reason being is because, I’ve been there. I was a young adult seeking treatment and felt like nobody understood because everyone else to start getting treatment till their late twenties and early thirties if not older. Volunteering at the young adult (18-25) shelter is a way to make sure I want to work with particular age group in the profession sense. What’s the worse thing that can happen? I realize its not the age group I am meant to work with and another thing to put on my résumé. So far I’m loving the fact that I am not only volunteering in a homeless shelter but volunteering with the age group that I am wanting to work with professionally.

As the year continues on, I am looking forward to what it brings professionally. I love my job as a Consumer Advocate however I want to be a Peer Support Specialist. I have been looking at Peer Specialist positions within the agency I work for as well as other agencies however I realize I am more likely to get hired on, if it is at another agency, if I have been at my current employer for at least a year. My one year anniversary at my current employer is September 8, 2015. Since my anniversary is in September, I have decided to wait to late November, early December to apply for Peer Specialist positions due to the fact that I will have been employed for an entire calendar year (January to December) by the time I find out if I get hired for a job. The longer you are at an employer the better it looks to future employers. Not only that, I also need to do a few things done to ensure I will able to get a job as a Peer. They are to get my teeth fixed as well as to get a drivers license. Yes, you read right, I don’t have a drivers license. I have always lived in area’s that have pretty good public transit. Another reason why I want to get a drivers license is because many positions require one. Not only will having a drivers license be helpful to me professionally, so will getting my teeth fixed. People do tend to look at ones smile when it comes to an interview as well as in everyday encounters and that is why I want to get them fixed. Plus it will make me feel better about myself.

Overall, I am feeling better about myself as 2015 continues. Yes, it has not been the best of years so far however, I am going to make sure it ends on a higher note than it did when it started or at least try. We all know that there are things beyond our control. The year may have started badly but I know as it continues, I am making sure there are positives in it. One way I am making it positive besides professionally is by hanging out with awesome people. That is what I am about to do after I end this particular post. I do apologize for it being so long. I hope to blog again tomorrow for the 4th of July. If I am unable to do so, have a Happy 4th of July. Be safe and Peace Out!!!

Daily Prompt: Thank You

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Thank You.” The internet is full of rants. Help tip the balance: today, simply be thankful for something (or someone).

As I was searching through the past daily prompts today, I came a crossed this daily prompt. I thought it would be a good one to do just because I have a lot to be thankful for.

First things first I am thankful for my dad. There are so many reasons I am thankful for my dad. Granted he may not have won the father of the year but I’m okay with that. My dad had to take on the role of mom when my own mother abandoned the both of us in the middle of the night. He not only raised me (with the help of my grandparents) in the 80’s and 90’s but showed me what it meant to persevere despite his developmental delays, Traumatic Brain Injury (TPI), mental illness and alcoholism. Most importantly, my dad showed me what recovery looked like. He showed that recovery isn’t an easy process but is well worth it. He also taught me that the road to recovery is uniquely individualized to each person.

Secondly, I am thankful for my grandparents for helping my dad raise me. I was not the easiest of children to raise especially when I was a teenager dealing with an eating disorder, mental illness and self-harm issues. My grandparents weren’t perfect but at least I know they tried to the best of their abilities and most importantly they love me with all their heart.

Another person I am thankful for is my fiancé, Junior. I am thankful for Junior for many different reasons. I am extremely thankful that he not only chose to ask me out and date me but asked me to marry him. The reason being is because he knew what he was getting into when we started dating. He knew how difficult it could and can be with my mental illness and that didn’t scare him. I thankful for Junior’s love for me and his encouragement with my recovery.

I have yet another person I am thankful for. This person has played a significant role in my recovery and am forever grateful to her for it. The person is my own therapist, Diana. (Side Note: Diana is a pseudonym to protect her, her family as well as her past, current and future clients.) Diana has been an incredibly formable person for me in my recovery. She has been in my corner, encouraging me, challenged me (when needed), listening to me and most importantly believing me when I tell her stuff that happened to me as a child. Diana has helped me grow as a person since she is a person who believes that recovery is possible despite how differently it looks to each person.

Last but not least I am thankful for my recovery with my mental illness as well as my eating disorders. I am thankful for my recovery because I am able to enjoy my life despite what difficulties I encounter. If I wasn’t in recovery I wouldn’t haven’t been able to get my certification as a Peer Support Specialist much less have my current job as a Consumer Advocate. I also wouldn’t be able to volunteer at the Warm Line or the young adult homeless shelter I just started volunteering at. Being in recovery means that I am now living a life worth living.

A life worth living also means finding out what you enjoy. That what I am going to do now. I am going to go and enjoy this beautiful summer day. I am going to go and eat at my favorite restaurant on the water front. Yes, that means I am ending this blog post for now. Peace out and enjoy your day.

Daily Prompt: Strike a Chord

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Strike a Chord.” Do you play an instrument? Is there a musical instrument whose sound you find particularly pleasing? Tell us a story about your experience or relationship with an instrument of your choice.

As I was searching through past topics of the Daily Prompts, this particular topic caught my eye instantly. It caught my eye for a multitude of reasons and decided that I would do this daily prompt before heading out to work today.

Yes, I do play an instrument. I play the flute. I’ve been playing the flute since the sixth grade. That was back in September of 1991. Holy shit, that was 24 years ago. The story around why I started playing the flute is quite humorous. I originally started playing the trombone and my arm was to short to slide to the fifth and sixth positions and even with the extension I was still unable to slide to the sixth position. Since I was unable to play the trombone due to short arms, I had to choose another instrument. I was debating between the oboe and the flute and was ultimately persuaded into choosing the flute by my best friend, who was learning to play the flute at the same time as well. I am beyond grateful that I was talked into playing flute but part of still wishes I picked up the oboe. The oboe has a beautiful yet unique sound and is an instrument that catches my ear.

I find many musical instruments quite pleasing to my ear besides the above mentioned instruments. One of the instruments I find particularly pleasing is the bagpipe. Yes, the bagpipe. People tend to laugh at the fact that I not only enjoy the sound of the bagpipes but want to learn how to play them as well. Over the years I’ve come to study the history of the bagpipe. The reason being is because it is a part of my heritage. I am half Irish and identify as Irish. Yes, I do know it’s also a part of Scottish heritage however, I don’t have any Scottish in my blood. A cool side note about bagpipes is my fiancé, Junior can play the bagpipes quite well. In fact he is a part of the pipes and drums with the fire department. He in fact is a firefighter and paramedic. The cool thing that I find about Junior playing the bagpipes is that he is Mexican and isn’t afraid to do so. (Junior is also able to play the trumpet and plays in a Mariachi Band).

Playing the flute has been a life safer to me in many ways. Playing the flute in the high school marching (and concert) band is what helped stay in school and prevented from dropping out. That’s why I am so passionate about keeping both the performing and fine arts in schools. The arts keep people like me in school.

Not only did playing the flute keep me in school, it has helped me enormously in my recovery with mental illness. Playing the flute helps with my mental illness in several ways. It helps keep me distracted at times. It relaxes me. Most importantly it helps me focus on my breath and breathing well. When I am dealing with severe PTSD symptoms I tend to forget to breath and the “normal” breathing techniques and exercises don’t help me much. The “typical” breathing techniques and exercises tend to make my PTSD symptoms worse due to some trauma. That is where the flute comes in to helping me focus on my breath. You need to breathe well to be able to play the flute properly. That means, me being able to breathe well not only helps me with playing the flute helps with the symptoms of my PTSD. You can say that playing the flute has been a type of therapy for me; music therapy. Unforantenly, not many places offer music therapy despite how helpful it is to many different people in this world.

When I chose this particular daily prompt, I had absolutely no idea where it would lead. I honestly didn’t think I would be discussing how the flute helped (and still helps) with my PTSD. I thought I would me discussing more how band kept me in school and how I now have life long friends because of band. In all honesty, I have my best friend since the third grade to not only to join band by picking an instrument but persuading me to choose the flute over the oboe when I was not able to play the trombone. Playing a musical instrument gives one a community that they will always be a part of.

Now that I’ve done this daily prompt, it brings joy to my soul that I was able to share one community I belong to, to you the blogging community in which I to belong to. Thank you for allowing me to share all this. I am going to have to end this blog for now because I have to go to work now. Have a wonderful work week everyone. Happy Monday and peace out everyone!!!!