Tag Archives: Depression

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am at a loss on what to say right now even though I have a lot on my mind. A lot on my mind because of everything that happened this past week. Not that any of it was bad. Just a lot happened.

Tuesday, I met with my therapist for our first one on one session. My new therapist appears to be cool. He is recovery minded and is in line with what I want to accomplish in regards to my recovery.

Wednesday, I had my job interview that went okay. In all honesty I won’t be let down if I don’t get the job as I don’t think the job would be a good fit for me to begin with.

Thursday, I met with my new psychiatric nurse practitioner. She appears to be cool. She took me off of the Seroquel as I am on Abilify now. I’m just having even more trouble sleeping now.

I also got my taxes done on Thursday. I am getting more money back than I expected and am thrilled about that. Now I can pay a good portion of my credit card off.

That’s pretty much what I did this week. I mean my depression has been acting up and it sucks shit but all I can do is accept reality and push through it. It’s the only thing I can do right now. I can not let it get to me at the moment as if I do then shit can hit the fan quite quickly.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Attempting to Lessen the Depression Symptoms

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World or at least what is left of morning. I am feeling slightly better than my last post but I realize it is going to be one of them days I have to pay attention to what is going on symptom wise. Knowing that I am depressed means I need to make sure I do basic self care shit; like eat, take shower; you know that kind of stuff.

Besides focusing on basic self care stuff, I decided to work on one of the workbooks I am working on; The Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook by Anneliese Singh. The chapter I am working on is having identify other identities we may identify as. An example of that is I am a person with live experience of a mental health diagnosis who is learning about Buddhism.  Working on this work book is challenging in a good way and helping me build up the confidence I want to have in my life.

Another thing I did was talking to my best friend of nearly 30 years. We talked for a couple of hours on the phone. It was a good conversation and am happy that we finally got to talk. She is one really good friend who has stuck by me during the bad times.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Saturday Morning Depression

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I’ve been awake for several hours now. I am a wee bit depressed. Not sure what is causing it but I sure in the hell know that the crappy weather isn’t helping. I just wish I wasn’t dealing with the depression however it is a reality I have to deal with.

A reality that is having me focus on good self care as well as doing DBT skills. In fact I feel like my DBT skills are self care. Or at least a form of self care. I am needing do some self-soothing skills as well as some distracting skills.

One of the skills, I’ll be doing is drinking tea which is self soothing for me. Another skill I am going to use is read the news paper which is somewhat of a distraction skill for me. I know it seems like a weird combination to do at the same time but it helps me if I start my day out like that.

I am also going to be going to the mall with a friend today. I am not a big mall person but this is an “out of the box” thing my therapist wanted me to come up with. Going to the mall will be challenging for me but it will be helpful for me as well.

Something that I have already done to help with my depression as well as my anxiety is some meditation and mindfulness practices. Since I have been doing the mindfulness and meditation on the regular basis, I have noticed some lessening of the anxiety or least lessening of the intensity of the anxiety.

Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Yucky Weather + Depression = Reading

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Right now I am dealing with some increase of depression symptoms. Which is not a good thing because the weather is just yucky outside. Yucky weather doesn’t help with the increase of symptoms.

Since the increase of depressive symptoms and yucky weather I am going to read. Hell, it is perfect weather to be curled up in bed with a good book. A book to help me forget about my symptoms even though I know it is temporary.

In fact it was my therapist that suggested that I read. He works odd hours and I am okay with that as it appears that it fits what I need at the moment. He works five days a week and two of those days his hours are 9am to 5pm while the other three days are 12noon to 8pm. Today is one of those days he is in the office till 8pm. That is why I was able to talk to him this late.

I think I am going to take the suggestion to go and read. Thank you for reading. Have a great weekend and Peace Out, World!!!

Boredom Strikes, Again

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I am at my mental health center bored half out of my mind. I, technically didn’t have to come in today but decided to do so, so I wouldn’t be isolating. Isolating is not a good thing for me when I am dealing with depression.

As I am sitting here in the computer room of day treatment, blogging I am waiting for my therapist as we have fifteen minute check in’s on Friday. The check in’s can be in person or over the phone. My therapist appears to be invested in my recovery which is good thing. But I don’t know how much he is invested at the moment as our therapeutic relationship just started.

Since I am so bored, I think I am going to schedule some things in to do for next week. Having a regular schedule tends to help me out a great deal. The structure is what I need for my recovery or at least part of my recovery.

Another thing I might do is one of the workbooks I carry around with me. I carry two workbooks with me so when I get bored or am waiting for an appointment, I have something to do.

I better get going and socialize with others as I am here to not isolate. Have are great day and Peace Out, World!!!

Time For A Nap

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am home from my mental health agency. I went to day treatment as well as art group. I of course am happy that I chose to go today.

As I mentioned earlier I briefly checked in with my clinician. I have a good feeling about him after my brief interaction with him today. I see him tomorrow one on one for our first “real” session with him.

It is beautiful day in Seattle today. I have been on a few walks to enjoy the weather.

After the enjoying the walks and getting no sleep last night, I am going to now take a nap. Having insomnia sucks shit.

Have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Facebook Meme’s That Describe Grief and Depression

Posted on by Gertie

I have decided to post meme’s on how I am feeling right this moment. Grief and depression.

GRIEFImage may contain: sky, ocean, text and outdoor

DEPRESSION

Image may contain: text

 

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am tired as hell as I didn’t get any sleep last night. I wish I could have slept however it was quite elusive. I think the no sleep thing is related to my depression but that is something to discuss with my mental health treatment team this week as I am meeting with my new clinician tomorrow and new psychiatric nurse practitioner on Thursday.

I am debating if I should go to Art Group later on today. It is in the early afternoon. I know I am when I don’t get sleep and I don’t want to snap (yell) at anyone today. I need to rest but I also know that Art Group is quite helpful for me. So, I need to make some decisions on what I need to be doing today and what is best for me.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Got Zzzz

Posted on by Gertie

ben yatıyorum sözlük ışığı kapatI am unable to sleep. I purposely didn’t go to bed at seven o’clock so I could sleep tonight. Apparently, the universe had thought differently. I just want to sleep. It’s almost three o’clock in the morning in my neck of the world and I just want to sleep. I think the sleep thing has a little bit to do with my stupid ass depression.

I have been doing some reading. I am finding it quite helpful tonight. It’s relaxing me enough that I hope that I can get an hour or two of sleep tonight.

Goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!

Feeling Better

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Today, I have been dealing with a lot of depression. I realized this about an hour and a half ago. I realized why my depression was acting up a little today. I had forgotten to do my meditation and mindfulness practice this morning. So, I did my practice and now I feel better. Today’s topic was love and kindness and how it is okay to self soothe. Meditation and mindfulness self soothes me and is a self care act for me.

After I did my meditation and mindfulness, I watched a few episodes of M*A*S*H. It made me laugh so I hard, I almost peed my pants. Humor helps me a great deal. M*A*S*H reminds me of my childhood when I would watch it with my dad.

It is time to get back to watching M*A*S*H. Have a great evening everyone. Peace Out, World!!!