Monthly Archives: February 2018

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! If you been reading my blog this past week you know that my grandma passed away. It’s been quite difficult for me and my family especially my grandpa. My grandparents were married for 62 1/2 years so of course its going to be difficult for him.

My friends have been a wonderful source of support the last few days. Friends who have no fear of seeing me cry or giving me reality checks when needed. Hell, my friends are stubborn ass mules just like I am. I think that’s what makes my friends awesome. They don’t put up with my bullshit.

Speaking of friends, I went to Red Robin with two of my closest friends. We had some yummy food. Food that is good for the soul.

I didn’t go to my volunteer job this evening primarily because of the grief I am dealing with regarding my grandma. People are pretty understanding about it. Having some awesome peer support is great.

Thank you for reading and Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 6: A Space To Write

Posted on by Gertie

For me having a space a good place to write also depends on the head space I am in at the moment. As of lately, I’ve been in a head space to where writing has been quite helpful for me.

When I am at hope I like to write facing my west living room window so I can look up and see the trees outside of my window. This helps me when I’m having trouble coming up with words to help me convey with what I want to say. The words someone says or writes can bring a person down or lift a person up. For me I hope that I lift folks up with what I say and write.

I say this because I’ve had harsh words said to me. Words that had me thinking about dying by suicide. (No, I’m NOT currently suicidal.) When I talk and/or write, I want to make sure my words don’t have others thinking about death by suicide.

For me the space to write all depends on my head space and is different every time I write. I like to write by water no matter my head space however that can be dependent on the weather if I write outside. I also like to write in mom and pop coffee shops. It helps with my creativity.

Rough Moment With Missing My Grandma

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I am having a rough moment. A rough moment with missing my grandma. I miss my grandma’s voice. I miss her smile. I miss her laugh. I miss her very much.

Something that I am going to do after I am done with this post is read. For me reading has been a tool that I am relying to help me escape from the reality of the pain I am in. Yes, I do allow myself to feel the pain no matter how difficult it may be. I just need some way to escape and reading is a healthy way to do it.

Thank you so very much for reading my many depressing post lately. Peace Out, World.

Saturday Morning Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! As I sit here at my laptop thinking about the sleep I got. Not the amount of sleep but the quality of sleep. I woke up this morning with drool on the Wonder Woman comic book I was reading last night. I fell asleep reading it and ended up getting good quality of sleep despite only get three hours of it.

Something I did last night besides reading and sleeping was watch the Olympics. For me watching the Olympics is helping me hold on to the hope that I finally got back when I was on an inpatient unit back in January. The Olympics not only brings hope to the world but brings it together like nothing else in the world.

I think I am going to get going. Thank you so much for reading. It is greatly appreciated from my end. Happy Weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is exactly twelve midnight in my corner of the world. I’m not sure if I will be able to sleep tonight but I hope I will be able to. As a precaution I came up with a plan to keep myself occupied if I am unable to sleep.

The plan is to do some art. Most likely some collaging. Collaging a poem or two or maybe more. It seems to be something I’ve been enjoying quite a bit the last few days. I might make one in memory of my grandma.

Another thing I have planned is to read my book Ship of Magic by Robin Hobb. Yes, it’s taking a while for me to read but am enjoying it quite a bit. I will also be reading Wonder Woman comic books.

Speaking of Wonder Woman, I am doing a Wonder Woman jigsaw puzzle. It’s a one thousand piece puzzle and love the challenge.

Thank you for reading. Have a good night everyone an Peace Out, World!!!

I Miss My Grandma

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I’m having a really strong moment of grief. Grief of loosing my grandma. I wish she was still here however I know she is watching over me as my guardian angel.

With the loss of my grandma, I’ve been receiving some great support from friends and fellow peer specialist. Support from people that I didn’t even know that cared. Having folks check in with me has been quite helpful for me.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s Been A Long Week

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday, World!!! As many of you know its been a long week for me. My grandma died on Wednesday. It’s been quite hard for me deal with the grief. Dealing with the loss of my grandma is quite painful.

Gilbert, my therapist, and I talked about the pain, I’m dealing with regarding my grandma’s death. We discussed ways on how I can remember my grandma. I came up with the idea of a tattoo. I love tattoos and hope I can find one to remember my grandma by.

Something else Gilbert and I discussed was what I can do to have some structure this weekend as well as how I am going do some good self care. We talked about blogging and journaling to help with the processing part of my grandma’s death. We also talked about doing art the help me express my emotions. Reading books and comics also came up to help me escape reality in a healthy way for an hour or two at a time. We also discussed music and doing some workbooks.

Doing good self care is key to my recovery and one of those things is to go and eat something. So, I am going to go and get some dinner. Happy Friday. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 5: Hook ‘Em With a Quote

Posted on by Gertie

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The above quote by Eleanor Roosevelt “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” hits close to home for me. It hits close to home because I am in the process of believing that my dreams will come true. Dreams that will come true with hope and determination. Determination that has helped with my recovery process will help me with my dreams and future.

A future that includes me having a college education that allows me to move up the career ladder. One that will allow me to be much more than a Peer Specialist. One that will allow me to be a Case Manager and/or Therapist. This is why I believe in my dreams. Dreams that I know will come true even if it takes me longer than the average person.

Fun Fact Friday

Posted on by Gertie
  • The average woman uses her height in lipstick in five years
  • You cannot snore and dream at the same time.
  • In Uganda, 50% of the population is under the age of 15
  • About 8,000 Americans are injured by musical instruments each year.
  • The Twitter bird actually has a name – Larry
  • California has issued six drivers licenses to people named Jesus Christ.

Friday Morning Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is seven fifteen  in morning in my corner of the world. I didn’t get much sleep last night because two of my neighbors were arguing last night. When they weren’t arguing they were pounding on each other’s doors and just making it miserable for the rest of us who live on my floor.

I personally think I would have gotten more sleep if I my neighbors weren’t being jerks to each other. In fact, my neighbors yelling at each other severely triggered my PTSD. Almost severely enough to where it nearly put me into crisis mode.

Thankfully, I was able to prevent crisis mode by using my DBT Skills. If it weren’t for my skills I don’t know what I would be doing. I put on my headphones and listened to music to drown out my neighbors screaming while I read. Both of these skills helped me most of the night and didn’t put me into crisis mode.

Another skill that helps me is reading the news paper while drinking some hot tea. Like every day, there was only bad news. Apparently, there is suppose to be a storm coming to Seattle. Not sure if it’s going to happen as it appears that anytime a storm is expected it never happens.

Thank you for reading. Happy Friday!!! Peace Out, World!!!